Wellness Coaching Australia's Blog

Why would a Coach need a Coach?


When we become skilled in a profession, or way of working, it is tempting to adopt the attitude. "Well I don't need the services of …… - after all, I am one". This argument is a bit weak when we are talking about a service provider such as massage therapist, dentist, physio or anyone who physically performs a treatment that requires an outside party to "administer" it - pretty hard to give yourself a shoulder rub! However, I have found that the best counsellors, coaches and other health professionals are the first to seek out the services of someone who works in their field, as they truly believe in the value of their profession. The best salespeople I know will buy from someone who has shown that they know how to persuade.

A coach cannot ever be a good coach until they have been on the receiving end of good coaching.
If coaching is "the art of creating an environment, through conversation and a way of being, that facilitates the processes by which a person can move toward desired goals in a fulfilling manner” (Tim Gallwey, 2000), then how can we create that environment without knowing what it feels like for the client? When we sit in the client's chair we can experience not only the feelings they go through, but also the results that can occur from working with a coach. Until we have gone through this process, we cannot share the enthusiasm that inevitably comes from being on the other side.

How does coaching and mentoring differ? 
Some new coaches feel they need to learn from someone who has more experience than they do, get feedback and at times direction from a mentor who has trained and excelled in their particular field. This will take more the form of a training session rather than a coaching session and be equally as valuable.

However, if the issue is more around helping you create a vision for where you want to go as a coach, or as an individual, to work out how this can fit into your current life and value system and design a plan for getting there, you might just need a good coach yourself.

If you see yourself nodding your head while reading this, our team at Wellness Coaching Australia provides a unique Coach Mentoring service that can be personalised on your needs. Whether you are:
• Hoping to gain a better understanding of any of the concepts taught in wellness coaching,
• Are seeking mentoring around your options as to future employment or life direction, or
• Need help with creating a business model, we can assist.

To find out more, register your interest with us and we’ll contact you to discuss your needs.


Stories to Inspire


People’s personal stories are endlessly fascinating. Everyone’s life narrative is a mine of rich and truly cinematic material. We've all experienced trials and tribulations: with sick parents, creative challenges, the death of loved ones and less than ideal upbringings. It’s heartening to be reminded that everyone’s pretty much in the same boat as far as these things are concerned, even the talented, rich and famous. Also, that the very darkest of clouds often have a silver lining.

Our friends at World Happiness Forum have shared the personal stories of 10 of their past and upcoming speakers at their suite of conferences across Australia – stories to inspire and uplift you. We hope you enjoy them.

Click here to download

Can women say No?


International Women's Day gave me the opportunity to speak to a lovely group of ladies in Sydney around the topic of "Happy, Healthy Workplaces" which was a topic that is close to my heart. However, as the day was really focused on the girls, I did my best to find the areas that females might find more challenging than others. Now this went against the grain for me as I do believe that if we are to gain an even footing in the corporate world, then we have to be able to consider ourselves as equally equipped to handle the "job"! Yet, there are differences between the sexes that are hard to ignore. And they come from a long history of the role that women have played for centuries.

There is no getting away from the fact that women bear the children. Men can step in almost immediately once the baby appears but the pregnancy and strenuous job of bringing the child into the world rests wholly on Mum! Women are working for (on average) considerably lower wages and that is gradually changing. So we are bridging the gap in many ways.

But what about our innate nature as human beings? Women are generally relationship-focused caregivers. Not all, but many, have an instinctive drive to care for others and to provide the nurturing type of support that suits positions that may be an adjunct to a more senior male. With this comes the inevitability of having work handed down to us. And this can be where the problem lies.

Are women weaker than men when it comes to saying "No"? And by that I mean the ability to say, "Enough is enough", or perhaps, "I would love to help you but I am unable to do so at the present time". When I posed this question at the room, I sensed that there was a general agreement with my assumption!

So what is the effect of this habitual way of being in the world and what do we do to get around it? Without doubt this tendency is the cause of stress and burnout for women in the workplace. We move from board room to breastfeeding, from executive to soccer Mum, from housework to spreadsheet analysis apparently effortlessly. But it takes its toll. Instead of believing that we are masters (mistresses) of multi focusing, it's time we realised that NO ONE MULTI-TASKS WELL!

The need to be needed may keep us warm at night but the cost to our physical health (where does exercise fit in?) and our mental wellbeing can be enormous. When we lose ourselves in others, how can we possibly recognise our own needs?

I would love to hear from anyone with ideas of how to stop the trend of never saying "No".

The Tail of a Wild Dog


It's February!  How did that  happen we ask ourselves?  Weren't we just looking at the first page of our fresh and new diary, thinking what a glorious feeling it was that the year had yet to unfold and what possibilities lay ahead?


Then suddenly, it's February.  I asked a colleague how her week was going the other day.  She responded with, "I feel like I'm hanging on to the tail of a wild dog!" That made me smile as I recognised the feeling.  And I know for a fact that I am not alone.


So why is this one of the most often cited reasons for people feeling, well, less than perfectly in control?  This sense that life races ahead and unless we hang on tight, we get left behind. I have two Labradors. On our morning walk to the park, they are also like wild dogs. After a run, they are calm, well-behaved and willing to be gently led to the next activity.  I want my life to look like that. Calm, obedient, good looking and satisfying!


We could list the many reasons why life today is this chaotic and demanding.  Technology; expectations (our own and others), distractions and multiple roles to mention a few. We need to manage time better. Or do we? Perhaps managing priorities and even our energy is a better place to start?  

Priority Management

How often do people say, "I have no time to exercise"?  Of course, they do.  It's just that exercise is a lower priority than the other things in their life.  And we all have that choice.  If we ask ourselves the simple questions:

What do I want more of?

What do I want less of?

The answers will be revealing.  The things that get in the way will be competing priorities.  What counts is  how much you want that missing aspect of your life.  How  much do you value it?  Worth spending some time thinking about that.


Energy Management

Then there's this question of exhaustion, or simply feeling too flat to be bothered. Try asking:

  • What gives me energy and what drains me?

    When am I at my best? 

With a bit of careful planning it is possible to organise our day so that we play to our strengths. If you do you best thinking in the early morning make sure you have a way to record your ideas. If your energy is low in the mid afternoon, perhaps plan to do mundane tasks that don't require much thought. Or find a way of boosting it by slotting in exercise at a time that gives a flow on effect. Don't leave the things you hate doing for the time you feel the least motivation to do anything! Take time out to work out how your natural energy flows.


Time Management
We can't make 24 hours any longer than it is.  But what we can do is ensure that we get the maximum result from the time we spend on a task/project.

Mind Management


To do this we have to organise our mind rather than live to the clock.  Margaret Moore writes of the six Rules of Order in her latest book "Organising your Mind, Organising your Life" and she stresses the need for developing the ability to focus and cut out distractions at appropriate times.  On the flip side, we also need to cultivate the ability to switch tasks without getting flustered and annoyed.  Very often our emotional state prevents us from being at our best and neuroscience shows that our thoughts can in fact calm the pre-frontal cortex - the part of our brain that  produces emotions that can sweep us along in a positive, or sometimes negative way.  Panic, anxiety, frustration all work against our working in a  relaxed steady state.  If we can start to recognise what patterns we fall into that make that dog run (the one we are trying to hold onto), we can then begin to retrain our brains and regain control.

Wellness Coaching is a rapidly growing field


Contrary to what people think, poor lifestyle habits do not stop at what we ingest, whether we move enough and what tine we go to bed.   Instead we are working with people at a deeper level to help them be more better performers, have more peace of mind, improve the quality of their relationships etc.  Together we set not only physical goals, but mental ones as well.  Exercise, nutrition, managing thoughts and emotions become the tools to create change and much of our work focuses on helping people work out what they want and why they want it and then understanding  why it is difficult to achieve.


This realisation is spreading through the health, fitness and wellness industries and very quickly into the corporate world where the main measure of success has always been financial return on investment.  What is happening now is that companies are recognising that what goes into creating this success is a multitude of factors, many of them concerning the people who work in the organisation and their level of satisfaction or "wellness".  



Open ears, Open hearts Open minds


We speak a lot about the future opportunity that Wellness Coaching has to offer Australians. In September, I was given the opportunity of speaking at the Australian Integrative Medicine (AIM) Conference last Saturday and it was an opportunity to take a close look at how tangible this opportunity really is.

The theme of the conference was “Bridging the Gap” and the aim of the AIM Association is to recognize and bring together health practitioners who use varied disciplines and methodologies to treat their patients. 

I have to admit I was expecting a fairly cool and possibly hostile reception - after all, wellness coaching is a new and unaccredited profession and the medical fraternity can have strong views on who is qualified to “help”.  Instead, I met a lot of people who really did have open hearts and open minds.

 

The very strong message that came across was that a change in public health would come by taking a united approach. Rather than working in silos we could (and should) work as a team to help people in a variety of ways– whether it was to manage pain, to end their lives with dignity, to stay well or simply to enjoy what they had. The shift is in the belief that there has to be a better way of doing these things than the old, cold professional approach that was more about control and delivering “prescriptions”.  Instead, creating rapport, showing empathy and focusing on the relationship as much as the outcomes were as important as the techniques and advice we were trained to give.

These are key principles that underpin wellness coaching and I felt very at home and thoroughly enjoyed my presentation to a room full of people who perhaps knew little about what we did but took only minutes to “get it”.

I spent the limited time I had there listening to people referring to naturopathy, acupuncture, Chinese medicine and many other “alternative” therapies  (known as CAM – Complementary Alternative Medicine) as being legitimate treatment methods.

Far from downplaying the need for evidenced based research and the need for continued growth in this area, the focus was on not so much fixing illness, but perhaps preventing it. As Dr Tim Sharp put it, “If we could cure the population of sickness in the world, would that be enough?”  I think not.   Yes we need to cure illness, but simultaneously we need to promote wellbeing.  Once again, there was recognition that the physical and mental dimensions are inextricably linked.

So how do we do this?  First, we start with an open heart.

To lay aside our professional status and expert knowledge that sometimes defines us takes courage.  Accepting that we don’t really have all the answers take humility.  I have worked with a lot of people now in wellness coaching workshops and love my work so much as the training predominantly attracts people with open hearts and open minds.  And who are humble.  I talk to a lot of very clever people. Clever in different ways. But the ones who embrace the coaching model have without exception a degree of emotional intelligence.

Now our training is accredited with ESSA, we will be seeing more AEPs (Accredited Exercise Physiologists). I look forward to working with this group of people and to helping them help others make positive changes in their lifestyle by using a collaborative, coaching approach. And when I am back in Melbourne in October, I also look forward to having other attendees of the conference in our workshop who wishes to learn more about what we do.  The ball is rolling and we momentum growing and together we are building a tribe.   I love to think that Wellness Coaching is part of the movement that will change the world by breaking down our barriers and helping us support each other through caring, better communication and above all, relationship.

If we can all open our hearts, open our minds and open our ears and take a similar approach to AIMA we would make a bigger difference in healthcare. 

If we can listen to the ideas of others and accept that there is much to learn, we would gain power in using the strength of many. 

If we could empower our clients to take responsibility for change by working with them as coaches, instead of doling out advice, we would truly help them.

If I could provide my trainees with a T shirt it would say, “I don’t have all the answers but I have some really good questions.” 

And above all, we can learn to listen to the answers. 



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